Author Topic: Little item sentences  (Read 7097 times)


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Re: Little item sentences
« on: July 21, 2011, 11:02:00 pm »
Moderate Mana Potion: A concoction made from bleach, vinegar, urine, and a pinch of brown sugar. Its aroma alone can melt steel, but fortunately for you, all it does in this game is restore 500 mana.
Big Mana Potion: It's better than a Moderate Mana Potion because it restores 800 mana, and has more friends, listens to trendier music, and gets invited to more parties. As well as more sex. Ohyes.
Minor Heal Potion: This generic potion restores 250 health points. I mean, it's really generic. The bottle is to scale.
Smal Heal Potion: When consumed, these potions instantly restore 500 of your precious Health Points. Or Hit Points, if you think they're called that. They also cause severe diarrhoea, nausea, hallucinations, and malignant tumours, but that's not relevant.
Minor Restoration Potion: This magical draught restores 2500 HP and 750 MP, and is probably made from liquefied fairies, or something. Who knows? But does it MATTER? You'll drink it anyway, even if you found it just lying around in some manky cave.
Elixir: An amazing brew made from the tears of a goddess, or something astounding like that. It restores all health and mana.
Hero Drink: The name, of course, is a euphemism.
Glass of Sludge: A thick, viscous ooze, just like mama used to make!
Wooden Round Shield: A round shield made of wood. Pretty light, but offers only some small protection. Good for poor people!
Mythril Saber: A sword forged from the highly unique-to-this-setting metal called 'mythril'. It's not an especially exciting sword. Its favourite colour is probably grey.
Gilmax: A solid, powerful axe made for rending armour.
Killer's Armor: A tough, durable suit of light armour made from the hide of some large, hardy beast. The spikes give it a rather barbaric look.
Stogo Helmet: A generic helmet, sometimes worn by young heroes out to save their worlds from evil pig men.
Death Spike: A spear made from the bones of some great dead beast, meant for slicing the bones of other great beasts.
Message to Farmer Allan/...: A message to Farmer (name). You can't read it though. Why? Because. Shut up.
« Last Edit: July 23, 2011, 08:42:52 am by Chimto »
Along the shore the cloud waves break,
The twin suns sink behind the lake,
The shadows lengthen
In Carcosa.

Strange is the night where black stars rise,
And strange moons circle through the skies,
But stranger still is
Lost Carcosa.

Songs that the Hyades shall sing,
Where flap the tatters of the King,
Must die unheard in
Dim Carcosa.

Song of my soul, my voice is dead,
Die thou, unsung, as tears unshed
Shall dry and die in
Lost Carcosa.
TCO Item List