Author Topic: Little item sentences  (Read 6250 times)

Pourquoi

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Re: Little item sentences
« Reply #75 on: May 25, 2013, 11:09:12 pm »
Pathetic Boots: These enchanted boots were once the property of a deadly assassin fond of chasing down his prey. He moved with such speed that his targets often didn't have the oppurtunity to respond, even on horseback. Over time, the assassin's fame spread, and though his name was never known, all knew to fear the words last heard by his victims:  'You can hide, but you cannot run!'
Destiny: The true weapon of a modern warrior, Destiny is not a sword in the traditional sense, but a nanotechnologically constructed blade that is dynamically 'forged' on command into a non-eutactic solid. Nanoscale whetting devices insure that the blade is both unbreakable and lethally sharp.
Shinji: A shaped crystal of solid ice, this blade is kept at absolute zero by many enchantments - while the wielder is protected from the unearthly cold, the blade will bring a deadly chill to those it strikes.
Heaven's Blade: A kingly sword, doing a kingly amount of damage in the hands of a kingly warrior.
Bug Shield: A shield full of packets of pheromones which can be released to call a bug. What do you mean, 'the pheromones wouldn't do that'? Well, it must be magic, then. Yes. A wizard did it.
Crystal Water: When imbibed, this bottle of premium water instantly restores 500 of your precious Health Points. Or Hit Points, if you think they're called that. It also causes severe diarrhoea, nausea, hallucinations, and malignant tumours, but that's not relevant.
Blood Drinker: This item is expensive! You should be proud to have purchased it!
Excalibur: No, this doesn't have anything to do with King Arthur's sword. Nothing at all. It's not even a reference to it or anything.
Wizard's Boots: Genuine magical boots! Whoops... I'll just remove this made in China sticker... Doesn't belong to this item, obviously!
Endless Potion: An ancient bottle containing a powerful healing salve. How can it refill itself and defy physics is still a mystery.
Legendary Wyrm's Head: The severed head of a wyrm. There is a hint of power in its depths, but it would fetch a good price at market regardless -- collectors love these things.
Manslayer: A large, serrated axe with little decoration.
Guado Armor: A suit of leather armour with metal plates underneath for added protection, or something.
A Bag of Worms: WHY A BAG FULL OF WORMS?! WHY?! WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?! IT DOESN'T FIT IN ANYWHERE AT ALL!! I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND!!
Evil Eye: This eye seems to be looking directly into your very soul... Ooooo~!
Bone Armor: This item's name might make you think that it's an armour suit made from bones, but you'd be right if you thought that. Completely correct.
Behearm: Despite its enormous size, this halberd can actually fit inside a small treasure chest. Which is interesting.
« Last Edit: May 27, 2013, 02:17:20 am by Pourquoi »
Along the shore the cloud waves break,
The twin suns sink behind the lake,
The shadows lengthen
In Carcosa.

Strange is the night where black stars rise,
And strange moons circle through the skies,
But stranger still is
Lost Carcosa.

Songs that the Hyades shall sing,
Where flap the tatters of the King,
Must die unheard in
Dim Carcosa.

Song of my soul, my voice is dead,
Die thou, unsung, as tears unshed
Shall dry and die in
Lost Carcosa.
TCO Item List